TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF! This is a critical step to your well-being and I cannot stress it enough. The stress of going through a divorce can cause people to lose chunks of their hair, develop rashes, have panic attacks, lose or gain unhealthy amounts of weight, and become very depressed. DON’T LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU! Here are some ways to cope with the stress you are feeling:
1-EXERCISE- Exercise boosts energy and improves moods. It helps alleviate stress. Cardiovascular activity helps to reduce stress hormones in the body and can also help create feelings of joy. Find an exercise that helps increase your heart rate (like running, dancing, kick-boxing, hiking, etc., and find something that soothes and calms you (like yoga, or tai-chi). Both forms of exercise will help keep your mood positive, your body healthy and your mind calm. (by Caron Kavanagh)
2-EAT HEALTHY- Drowning your sorrows in Ben & Jerry’s or eating our weight in chips and dip is counter productive. Although the immediate gratification of enjoying our favorite guilty indulgence may taste great in the moment, it doesn’t provide your body the nutrients it needs. Our body says, “I’m hungry” and we feed it nutritionally bankrupt, empty calorie food. Our body says “I’m thirsty” and we give it soda, coffee or alcohol. Our body still needs the nutrients and our brain tells us we’re still hungry so we eat more bankrupt foods and the cycle continues. This can cause weight problems and a lowered immune system.
Your mind and body is going through a stressful time and needs “high-octane fuel” to perform optimally. Practice self-care and help support your physical and mental health by eating well. Eat organic when possible (absent of herbicides and pesticides), low-fat meats, vegetables and fruits. Drink a minimum of 64 oz. of purified water every day – best to drink ½ oz. per pound of body weight. Give yourself 1 day a week to enjoy a few of your favorite indulgences so you don’t feel deprived. Eat slowly and enjoy the experience. This practice can teach you to be in control of your eating habits. (by Caron Kavanagh)
3-Meditation - Quieting the mind and creating a time for introspection is extremely good for balance and vitality. Give yourself just 5 minutes in the beginning of the day to center yourself. Close your eyes and take a deep breath and exhale completely. Then slowly inhale counting to 5 and then slowly exhale counting to 5. Start with 5 minutes and you can work your way up to 15 minutes or so. Upon completing the exercise, give thought to what you want from your day (peace, productivity, happiness, clarity…) and set your intention. Energy follows thought, and you can create the kind of day you want to have. (by Keisha Gallegos)
4-It is OK to put yourself first, it isn’t selfish. Remember what we are supposed to do on an airplane if the cabin loses pressure? Secure our own mask first, and THEN assist your child. If you are stressed out, frantic, and empty- how can you give anything at all to anyone else? Fill up your own tank first, so you have something to give others. Engage in hobbies you once loved, or start something new. Now is a great time to try a new activity! Join a book club, a hiking group or church choir if that’s something that sounds fun to you. It is vital that you reconnect with your own feelings of joy, remember what makes you happy. (by by Keisha Gallegos)
5-Find a positive support group through your church, synagogue, health care provider, etc. There are many divorce support groups, and it can be cathartic to meet with others in your situation. (by Keisha Gallegos)
6-A great way to stop feeling crummy about your own circumstances is to do something for someone else. VOLUNTEER! It can help you regain a gratitude attitude, and put you on the road to feeling good again. (by Keisha Gallegos)
7-READ! These are some titles I have found very helpful when going through a hard time, and looking for clarity…
“The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle
“The Art of Extreme Self Care” by Cheryl Richardson
“Finding Your Own North Star” by Martha Beck, PhD.
( by Keisha Gallegos)